This story was reported a couple days ago after UK retailer Marks & Spencer (M&S) apologized for an incident where a mother and daughter were made to feel uncomfortable in one of their stores by a trans employee who offered to help them in the lingerie section.
The retailer said it was “truly sorry” after the mother complained that her 14-year-old daughter had felt uncomfortable when they were approached by a trans shop assistant in the lingerie area of the shop, where they were hoping to have a bra fitting.
Although the staff member was polite, the mother said she felt it was “completely inappropriate” for her daughter to be approached by a “biological male” in that section.
In a complaint to M&S, she told the retailer: “Imagine her horror, then, when the person to approach us and ask if we needed help was a transgender ‘woman’, ie, a biological male.
“This is obviously the case: he is at least 6ft 2in tall... My daughter recoiled, so I politely declined the offer and we left immediately. She was visibly upset and said she felt ‘freaked out’.”
In its apology the store admitted that the person who'd offered the mom and young girl help was not a woman. The store suggested it would make sure a woman employee was available to help if the girl and her mom wanted to return. The mom, who has remained anonymous, found this response less than completely satisfying as did a campaign director for Sex Matters:
Fiona McAnena, director of campaigns for the human rights charity Sex Matters, which campaigns for clarity about biological sex in law and life, said that M&S needed to “rethink its priorities”.
“This is what happens when a business centres the feelings of men who identify as women, even at the expense of their own customers. It is entirely inappropriate for a man to approach a teenage girl in a lingerie department.
“Being dressed in women’s clothes doesn’t change that. It’s extraordinary that a man would regard himself as entitled to do such a thing; most men know how unwelcome that would be.
J.K. Rowling weighed in and suggested customers should "vote with their wallets."
It's time for women to vote with their wallets. If stores like M&S continue to flout the Supreme Court ruling on women-only spaces, prioritising the wishes of men who want to undress near, or help fit bras on teenage girls, a boycott seems appropriate.https://t.co/9RsUetLEVA
— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) August 4, 2025
By the next day, the Independent had published a response to the story from someone who suggested there was no problem at all with a 6'2" male offering to help a 14-year-old with a bra fitting.
We don’t know whether the staff member who reached out to offer assistance to this 14-year-old child was trans, and it doesn’t even appear that they were offering to fit bras for her. But even if she were trans, she was just doing her job, and doing it well, by all accounts. Doesn’t every one of us deserve to be able to do that without discrimination or prejudice, let alone an apology from our employer related to us simply existing?
Had the person offering to help my 13-year-old daughter in the M&S undies department been trans, I would have had no problem with it – and crucially, neither would she. How do I know? I asked her.
My daughter’s exact response (with the inevitable bit of exasperated sighing) to being helped, or even fitted, was: “I’d hate anyone measuring me, Mummy. Why would it make any difference if they were trans?”
As I mentioned above, we do know this person was a man because M&S said as much in their apology. As for it not mattering, I have no doubt that many progressives feel that way, but this strikes me as another instance where transgender activists have stumbled into the wrong end of an 80-20 issue. As with men in women's prisons, men in women's shelters, men in women's locker rooms, etc. this is probably an issue where most people have an innate sense men probably don't belong in this particular space, especially with teenage girls.
It's really quite astounding how many men are willing to state publicly that mothers shouldn't teach their teenage daughters to say 'no' to male strangers offering to help with their bras. @DavidLyddon pic.twitter.com/y8fkFX6FpV
— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) August 6, 2025
Let me make this really easy for you, India. Lesbians belong in the women's changing room because they're women. Cross-dressing men who offer to fit bras on teenage girls belong in a police interview room. pic.twitter.com/6CsghFIqIE
— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) August 6, 2025
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