Saturday's 'No Kings' protests turned out to be one of two things - either the sort of hilarious freakshow bust you were expecting, or the eventually violent freakshow bust you were also expecting because they just can't help themselves.
Holy smokes.
Even Pensacola had its little gathering of socially maladapted people, although I don't think it remotely equaled the '3100 people' they claimed to have had at their last gathering of the Klan.
Needless to say, we avoided the area, as it's an irritatingly busy intersection even on the best day.
A gaunt and clearly twitchy 'Tampon' Tim Walz was seen in Minnesota addressing his hard-core Somali supporters and pledging eternal support. That's going to be hard to do, as he's out of a job in a few months and most probably looking at some extended courtroom time. His whacky little missus will have to give up sniffing the air for burning tires, like a hyena for rotting carrion, and go back to teaching to pay the bills. I can't imagine how much more pleasant that's going to make her, wrapped as tightly as she is already.
Walz panders to Somalis with a "special thank you" at No Kings:
— Western Lensman (@WesternLensman) March 28, 2026
"Here's our pledge to you, our Somali Minnesotans. Your great grandchildren will still be here — when that orange clown is in the dustbin of history." pic.twitter.com/V5ZOBNnNyG
The geriatric boogie crews were out in force across the country.
The energy at the “No Kings” rally is electric!pic.twitter.com/ts3N0Wcm1r
— C3 (@C_3C_3) March 28, 2026
cringe cringe cringe
Jane Fonda and Bruce Springsteen film cringe video at a No Kings rally in Minnesotapic.twitter.com/RPdzf3c2mM
— Libs of TikTok (@libsoftiktok) March 29, 2026
I sure hope they wore their sunblock.
Blood pressure meds can wreak havoc when you're out in those bright rays too long.
🚨#BREAKING: This is completely uncut footage of the "NO KINGS" rally here in downtown Asheville NC...
— Matt Van Swol (@mattvanswol) March 28, 2026
Study this crowd carefully.
I dare you to find the one thing every single person here has in common.
Take your time... I'll wait!!! 🤣🤣🤣 pic.twitter.com/dWOawqiqEd
And the problem with these...um...older folks is that quite a few of them don't have the sense of humor or the patience they once may have had in the first full, fresh blossom of their youth. So they tend to get very snippy when questioned, even if it's politely enough.
And God FORBID you point out a glaring error in their thought train.
LMAO 🤣. No kings protester completely LOSES IT and STORMS AWAY when the interviewer points out that nobody voted for Kamala and she was installed as the nominee pic.twitter.com/k4soNACCuS
— Libs of TikTok (@libsoftiktok) March 29, 2026
Scarlett O'Hara would be envious of that hissy fit.
It was kind of fun watching folks debunk massive overhead No Kings crowdsize claims, though. It's so much easier now to nail fakes, and it can be done almost in real time.
— Habs🦎Zilla 🇺🇸🇨🇦 (@Habz68) March 31, 2026
In Portland and Los Angeles, No Kings was just an excuse for the usual suspects to get back on the streets for some havoc. They marched and chanted for a little bit as if they were 'protesters,' and then went straight back to business.
No Kings Protest led to an ICE detention center being broken into in Portland. pic.twitter.com/DWLh4rrFlJ
— DramaAlert (@DramaAlert) March 29, 2026
It quickly became 'Kill Your Local ICE Agent' day, which is any day ending in 'y ' out there.
LA chaos: "No Kings" crowd turned violent near the detention center, hurling cement blocks, rocks & bottles at cops.
— SpeedySMM (@speedysmm4547) March 31, 2026
Citywide tactical alert issued, at least 75 arrested.
Mostly peaceful, right?🤔pic.twitter.com/DHsR5uv4YK https://t.co/3HOKb2r2Gg
This banner, which someone paid good money to fly over the heads of Los Angeles No Kings revelers, was rage-bait money well spent. Luckily, no one throwing concrete on the ground or trying to cripple LAPD police horses could read the air service name on the side of the plane that high, so that business is safe, too.
😳 This is Some Big Time Rage Baiting In LA for the No Kings Protest! 😭 pic.twitter.com/zLrhMFFtpE
— JC Vollentine (@Theonlyjcvolly) March 31, 2026
But the absolute worst, even with the obese Mad Max/Silence of the Lambs act (too disgusting to post) or the myriad ranks of warbling seniors, with or without guitar accompaniment, and social justice grannies bravely sacrificing themselves so black folks wouldn't be arrested (AY DIOS MIO)...
No Kings protester explains why the crowd is all old white people.
— Hunter Eagleman™ (@Hunter_Eagleman) March 29, 2026
“This is not about or for people of color to be out on the street.”
“If anyone’s going to be arrested here, it’s gonna be a black person.”
These people are absolutely INSANE! 🤦🏼♂️ pic.twitter.com/2KbLLpE6jc
...was this business.
Can we create a Constitutional amendment to ban theater kids?
— Cynical Publius (@CynicalPublius) March 31, 2026
This clown, in his bright barn red lipstick, goes up in the Man Hall of Shame along with other recent and unlamented Democrat icons as such Pajama Boy, Barack Obama's opening day pitch, every last actor in the Men for Harris commercial, and every oleaginous Newsum crossed leg/jazz hands/shimmy shoulder appearance ever.
That party has a serious testosterone deficit, and all the visits to a clinic in the world aren't going to be able to help them in time to pretend otherwise, let alone actually find a masculine Democrat that they can trot out in front of the general public as authentically one of them.
Not a living soul would ever believe it.
What the protest signs said was partially true - they are the party of no kings.
What they do not need is any more queens.
